How To Know If You're In Your Saturn Return

I looked up from my desk the other day and realized my life was entirely different than it was just a couple of years ago. New job, new apartment, single, two cats. I’ve broken my own heart in a way too personal and sad to mine for content, gotten hit by an E-bike while walking through Grand Army Plaza and broke my elbow so badly it required surgery, lost relationships and completely reconfigured others. Some might say I’ve had some shitty luck, others might say the culprit is ‘Saturn Return’ — a term even those of us (me) who are not versed in astrology have probably heard.

If you haven’t heard: Saturn return happens every 29.5 years and it literally means Saturn has made a (roughly) full orbit around the sun and has landed in the same position in the sky it was in when you were born. So those in their late 20’s, late 50’s, and god willing, late 80’s are experiencing their “Saturn return” years, years that are notoriously transitional and rocky. More information can be found in thousands upon thousands of TikToks telling those of us born between 1993 and 1996 to “buckle up,” with relatable comments like: “Idk what any of this means. Will I or will I not continue to be miserable?”

It might seem narcissistic to focus on the maladies in my one little life (right now, particularly). But I’m not alone. When I put a call out on my Instagram — as one who left full-time journalism for a full-time day job lazily does when trying to still hold their claim on the title of ‘writer’ — my DMs were flooded with responses with similar accounts of the late 20’s experience. People wanted to talk about it: how these years were particularly fraught and scary, how increased self-awareness can be difficult to transform into actionable change.

One woman I know said she was recently let go from her job and was wondering if Saturn Return was behind the setback. Another described the experience as such: “I don’t feel old enough to be like I HAVE TO CUT THE SHIT AND STOP DOING THINGS THAT ARE PROBABLY AGAINST MY BEST INTEREST but they do feel like they hold more weight. Being like, I’m an adult so like if I don’t fold my laundry I’m not gonna just magically become an adult who is on top of things the way I grew up seeing and knowing adults to be.” And another wrote, “Everyone I know who is 28-29 is fucked in the head rn.” Others wanted to get on the phone, if for no other reason than to talk and catch up as many of us have fallen out of touch over the course of our tumultuous, self-involved 20’s.

As I previously mentioned, I know nothing about astrology so I consulted an expert. Larry Easley of Larry Easley Galaxy is a New York-based astrologer, artist, and “student of the universe” from Nashville, TN. He also writes a recurring style horoscope column for Reviewed, USA Today. A church-going kid from a traditional background, Easley said he’d always had a bent for the occult, mystical, and spiritual (“A lot of it has to do with being a gay person, a queer person,”) but did not put his interest into operation until the pandemic, amid his own Saturn Return years.

Over the phone, Easley told me that he thinks of Saturn as the “cosmic safety inspector.” Saturn, he notes, is the planet of structure, time, boundaries, wisdom, and responsibility. “Saturn will come through and bang on the walls and rattle the pipes and kind of do a stress test to see are you doing the things you're supposed to do? Are your foundations secure?” he says. It can be unpleasant, but in many cases, Easley says it can lay the groundwork for a lighter, more aligned life.

Saturn’s aesthetic is even drab. Jupiter and Venus are sexy planets (big, beautiful, bright, and shiny) whereas Saturn, the farthest planet from Earth that can be seen without a telescope, appears as a dim brown spot, stain-like and pitiful. But, of course, life itself is often dim, drab, and frankly, bad. Easley put it this way: “Being human, there's the good and the bad, the sweet and the sour. Dealing with Saturn is like eating your broccoli, you might not want to but you'll be strong-boned.”